I’ve anhedonia and wish to educate my mind the way to take pleasure in issues once more

I noticed a couple of days in the past that I’ve been coping with anhedonia for the final decade and it is solely gotten worse. Today after I wakened, I made a decision that I’m lastly finished feeling this manner and I’m prepared to assist my physique and thoughts regain their capability for pleasure. I’m so uninterested in feeling like a husk of my former self. Open to suggestions, but additionally hoping to assemble an inventory of small, on a regular basis actions that I can do to assist me reestablish my id and passions. (Note: I’m present process each CBT and EMDR remedy and have been secure on the identical medicines for melancholy and ADHD for a bit of over a decade.)

I not too long ago realized that I’ve been affected by anhedonia after surviving an intense ten-year interval of disruptive life modifications and challenges. There has additionally been loads of pleasure throughout that point, too, however trauma and grief have decimated my sense of self. I now not get pleasure from the issues that I used to like, and I miss the one who I was.

There had been a couple of totally different triggers behind the anhedonia, however maybe the most important came about final summer season, after I completed petering out of prescription anti-anxiety medicine (earlier AskMe for reference) after taking them every day for ten years.

The anhedonia started after I first began taking anti-anxiety meds (benzos, to be extra particular) however grew to become a lot worse after I went off them. I do know that is as a result of my physique grew to become depending on the anti-anxiety meds to create feel-good chemical substances. EMDR and microdosing psilocybin have helped me scale back a few of my post-benzo anxiousness, however I’ve been so centered on treating the anxiousness signs that I utterly neglected the melancholy/anhedonia.

For instance, I’ve at all times been enthusiastic about gathering vinyl records and ethnomusicology, however after final summer season, I went from having much less curiosity in music to little interest in listening to music in any respect(!). If and after I do hearken to music now, the one style I can actually deal with is ambient. I nonetheless have a deep love and appreciation for the opposite genres of music I as soon as loved, nevertheless it now looks like extra of a "theoretical" love than one thing I actively need to expertise.

I do know that common train (together with yoga to reactivate my parasympathetic nervous system) is the reply and I’ve spent a decade lamenting my former athletic self – I’m a damaged file in that regard. But even after I pump myself up and get excited to do a yoga session or some body weight workout routines, I lose curiosity and resume a "what is the level?" angle. It’s simpler to do nothing and be in my head. I’ve sufficient power to be a supportive accomplice to my partner, do a very good job at work, and deal with chores, however the whole lot else feels pointless.

Anyway, now that I perceive that that is anhedonia and it’s normal amongst individuals who give up anti-anxiety meds, I’m able to do one thing about it. I wakened this morning considering "Fuck this, I haven’t got to really feel this manner anymore," however I would like some assist creating an inventory of small, every day, particular duties I can do to assist my mind and physique discover ways to take pleasure in issues once more.

So far, I’m considering small issues to assist me set up a baseline. They must be sufficiently small that it is nearly not possible to say no to them to start with. I’ll solely do a couple of of those at first and add extra as I develop stronger, however listed below are some examples of what I’m considering:
– Not have a look at or use my cellphone for the primary hour of the day (I’ve been doing this one for the final week now and it has been serving to).
– Do one plank day-after-day. Hold it for so long as I can, and maintain monitor of how lengthy I can maintain it every time to see my progress.
– Do 5 minutes of restorative yoga every morning. Cat/cow, kid’s pose, and many others., to loosen my backbone and get me snug with my physique once more.
– Write one haiku day-after-day (I did a "one haiku a day" mission after I was in school nearly twenty years in the past, and I actually loved it).
– Do one "spa" factor for myself every day. I have already got a robust skincare routine, however I’ve give up caring about different features of my look and I would like assist in that enviornment.
– Pick one small mission I can work on whereas watching TV and stress-free. I’ve gotten again into calligraphy and drawing, so perhaps these; knitting/crochet could possibly be good to maintain my fingers occupied.
– Take a every day stroll down the road, even when it is simply to the nook and again.

I’m additionally setting a timer to take melatonin later as a result of I do know I do higher after I get up early within the morning, and I’d love to do loads of these items after I first get up so I can set a very good tone for the remainder of the day. I have to reset my physique clock.

Open to every other concepts, ideas, and suggestions that others might need for the way to "educate" my mind to take pleasure in issues once more.

Vinyl

by way of Ask MetaFilter questions within the human relations class https://ift.tt/ckALMRy

March 25, 2024 at 05:33PM